What will dogs eat?

Over the years I've owned 6 Great Danes, so I've seen my share of what dogs will eat. Lets start w/ Juliet, she is my oldest and she was the first to rob my refrigerator. If you own a dog, don't ever open the fridge and turn your back. She stole fried chicken and I didn't know it was gone until I found her eating it in the closet. Then came Cozette and Sophia...Lord have mercy, those dogs would eat anything it didn't even have to be edible. I think the first thing they ate was cereal, including a large portion of the boxes. Eventually I learned to put the cereal & crackers were they couldn't get to them. Of course I'm not perfect and sometimes things were left were they could get to them. I was making Black bean & Ham soup one evening. At that time my husband and were being interviewed to be foster parents. I was between the kitchen and dining room talking to the foster people and dicing up the ham. Now, the kitchen and dining room were right next to each other so I was back and forth talking to them and cooking. I wasn't surprised that Cozette ate the ham, I was surprised at how quick it happened. I ducked out of the kitchen for no more than 10 seconds, came back in and the whole ham was gone. Cozettte wasn't in the middle of eating the ham...the ham was just gone, like it had never existed. Cozette was just standing there not licking her lips or chewing or anything, just standing there. I told my husband we were just havin' Black bean soup that night. Cozette and Sophia also ate a big box of Velveeta cheese. All I ever found to prove that it was them and that I wasn't losing my mind, was half of the yellow box on top. I never found the foil that it comes in nor did I find the brown box on the bottom. Apparently they had ate that too. Cozettte used to get in these funny moods where she would eat things that were inedible, like plastic bags or film negatives. Of course it would make her sick and she would throw it up. One Christmas, I caught Juliet just about to eat some German chocolate cupcakes. I literally caught her poised over them w/ her mouth open. She looked at me out of the corner of her eye and then walked away. Sometimes w/ Cozette & Sophia we would come home to find piles of throw up w/ socks in it or half eaten blankets. Then came Ms. Ellie. She pulled a hot pot of squash down off the stove and tried to eat it...she wasn't successful, it was a piping hot pot of squash. That brings us to Ginger, she's sweet, mild mannered and doesn't get into stuff. She aids in my clean up. If we have corn or rice as a side dish the "man cub" gets it all over the floor. When the kids are done eating, we let Ginger in the kitchen and she takes her time and gets every grain of rice or kernel of corn of the floor. I couldn't do a better job if I used the vacuum cleaner. I love Great Danes and they're wonderful personalities. I do believe I will always own at least one.

The 2nd stand of the Masons (The Flea Wars)

It started about a month and a half ago. They attacked the little one first. He is short, his hyde is tender and his reflexes are slow. He was not aware of them at all. I knew about them...I dreamt they were coming. Their numbers weren't great then. Our 1st stand came on a Saturday. We'd prepared that week. We bought bombs, Blue Dawn and Triazanon for the yard. We bathed the dogs and sprayed the yard. We took cover w/ the dogs, and the children at Brian's parents. After a few hours, we went back to the house...we thought we were safe. Little did we know that we had just angered them. After a few days they were back w/ a furious vengeance. They took all of their vengeance out on the little one and Juliet. Brian and the girl had tough hydes and thus were not affected by their vengeance. When I saw what they were doing to my oldest furry friend and to the little one. I was hardly able to contain my anger. I began to devise a strategy... an expensive but effective strategy. I spent all my spare time researching what would kill them and kill them immediately. Unfortunately we had to wait until we could buy what we needed. In the meantime, I bought Off and sprayed the little one w/ it 3 times a day. They were no longer able suck the blood from his tender flesh but he was still scarred. When the time finally came, I bought what I needed from the Internet. The chemicals I bought for the yard had been banned in 8 states, Texas wasn't one of them. The day of reckoning was upon us. All the chemicals I needed had been procured. Brian & I took the girl and the man cub to his parents the night before. When we came back home we prepared the house for battle late into the night. I awoke early the next morning and let The Colonel & Ginger out back, then I took Juliet out front. I sat and waited on her to do her business. It was already warm but there was a cool breeze blowing. It was a good day for a battle...I was ready. I got Brian up and we bathed Juliet first. Afterwords we took her to Brian's parents. Next we did The Colonel, he is large and difficult to work on. Last came Ginger, who is the easiest of the 3 to bathe. We took the 2 of them to my aunts house. The baths were successful, all of the tiny little leeches on the dogs were dead. We came back home, where we found one of my team members already waiting. I had assembled my team earlier in the week...my Mother and my best friend. My best friend had came to get down. Brian took the chemicals for the yard out and soon began his siege. I picked up my giant aerosol can and told Shwari to follow me. I began spraying the carpet, Shwari was making sure I got every square inch of every room and and all furniture with fabric. With every spray, I was getting closer & closer to the final phase of the battle. I forgot to take one thing into account though...I didn't get any masks. By the last room, the fumes had almost overwhelmed me. I was light headed and my back was killing me from bathing the dogs and stooping and bending spraying the house. For future reference, bathing 3 Great Danes is not an easy job. My Mother got to the house as I was finishing spraying, she brought masks for the next phase. We all 3 put our masks on and I went outside to see if Brian wanted one...he didn't. The last phase consisted of us putting flea powder in the carpet. Shwari and I got 2 shakers of flea powder and my Mother took the big can of it. We all took a room and put powder down. After we had gotten it all down, we each got a broom and started sweeping it deep into the Knapp of the carpet. I only got through the living room I was bone tired and had that spray in the back of my throat. I was also, probably, a little high. After it was over, my team left and Brian came in. He went to the sink and gargled a few times, he had the yard spray in the back of his throat too. We both went and lay down feeling victorious. We were out numbered by 300,000 to 1 but we had beat them back. I don't know how long our barrier will hold but we also put the dogs on Frontline plus. If they come back... we'll be ready. To all of you fighting this war, God speed.

My List of Gripes pt. 3

As I was writing my list of Gripes pt.2, I got so heated up that I forgot what my other gripes were. Here are the rest of my gripes: PETA & Vegans. These people are liberal and supposedly fair minded but they completely contradict themselves. How come it's okay to say you're liberal but at the same time scold people for their own beliefs. Okay, so you don't want to eat or wear anything that's had a face. Don't you think that I should be allowed my on views just like you're allowed yours. I just want everyone reading this to know, if anyone should dash red paint on me while I'm wearing my silver fox, I'm going to jail that day; because I would take that coat off, wrap the sleeves around that persons throat and choke them unconscious. Now that would be irony.

My Gripe list prt. 2

Let's talk turkey y'all. Have y'all taken a look at the big box of crayons lately? I was trying to color my little boy's ABC card's and I couldn't find the colors I was looking for. In a box of 96 Crayons the colors are baffling, because they don't have the regular names they used to have. Red is now Razzmatazz. I went through all the shades that seem like they might be red and was wrong every time until I got to Razzmatazz. Some of these new "tricked up" color names are: Raw Sienna, Cerulean, Wisteria, Mahogany, Spring green, Cerise, Timber wolf, Sepia, Golden rod, Jazz berry Jam,& Tumble weed. Can any of you tell me what those colors might be? Can you see why I was confused? To top it it off, there are some crayons in that box that don't have names. It's like the Crayola people said; they're guess is as good as ours.

The new house

Hey y'all!! Okay, since we've been here in this house, we're still surronded by our own drama, but that's better than dealing w/ the drama of others. Let me give you a run down. I backed into the garage door as it was going up. I thought I'd cleared it but I was wrong. Colonel jumped on Juliet and as I was trying to break them up, my finger got mangled. Surprise though...I have "Slayer" healing abilities and after about 2 weeks it was healed. I think there might be some nerve damage though. Ling Ling birthed her kittens. She had 4, one was still born, the 2nd one was accidently killed by Juliet, Ling Ling ate the third one (believe me you don't want the details; it's the thing nightmares are made of), and poor little Jinx, (the last one) just wasn't thrifty and died of natural causes. I found a new home for Ling Ling last week. Brian's new job is going great. I no longer suspect that he might kill our whole household and himself. However, the percentage of me killing him in a rage has gone up to 5 percent. He threw out issues 1 & 2 of my BtVS comics. Joss Whedon who is the creator and head writer on BtVS put out the 8th season of the show in comic book form. Mr. Whedon is doing all the writing and he's a genius if you ask me. I just found out yesterday that Jock (my little boy) is allergic to Penicilllin. We found out because he had an allergic reaction to some meds he was prescribed. He's better today, but yesterday was extremely stressful. I try to keep the full armour on and God is still blessing us cause Jock could have been a whole lot worse. Praise be, we have insurance now & my kids can go to the doctor. I also don't have to break my Lexapro down the middle anymore. I get to recieve the full benefits of my happy pills. I'm wrapping it up now The View is about to come on... gotta see who they're voting to join the island. Peace & Love all around you.

Shiney Hair

A couple of weeks ago I was getting my hair done for my Grandmother's birthday party. Another lady was there at the same time. She was talking and she said a friend of hers at work is worried about her hair being shiney, this woman always wants to know if her hair is shiney. Okay y'all, on my list of priorities; shiney hair is no where on that list. I'll give you a run down.

#1. Did I already take a Xanax xr with my sleeping pills? I sometimes forget if I did or not and since I'm not ready to wake up in heaven just yet, I have to force myself to remember.

#2. Did I put the tops back on my sleeping pills & both kinds of Xanax tightly? Wouldn't want Jock to get into that.

#3. Is there enough dog food?

#4. Did I feed the dogs?

#5. Did I take meat or fish out to thaw for dinner?

#6. When was the last time I put food in the cat's bowl?

#7. Did I turn the oven off?

#8. Did I lock the gate when I left the room? That's a very important one. If I don't lock the gates, Jock can open them resulting in Colonel jumping on Juliet & me having to get him off of her.

#9. Did I pay the light bill? No explanation needed.

#10. Where's Jock? He can open the back door & I sometimes forget to lock it when I let the dogs in.

#11. WHAT'S ALL THAT SCREAMIN'?!!

#12. Where's Jock? Nothing good can come from me not knowing where he is in the house.

#13. Are there enough diapers?

I could go on but my list of worries is very long. Shiney hair is not now, nor will it ever be on my list of worries.

Our new house

I love our new house & the kids love it too. We haven't met any of our new neighbors and that's fine with me. We do have one little problem though...Rabbits. Wild rabbits roam or back yard. Ginger got one of them and that rabbit won't be bothering us, or anyone else anymore. Brian found another dead rabbit outside too. I don't know which of the dogs killed that rabbit. My greatest worry is that Colonel will see one of those rabbits crawling under the fence and he'll go straight threw the wooden fence trying to catch it.