The Shrillest Shriek

My definition of The Shrillest Shriek:  an involuntary sound your body makes when startled.  The Shrillest Shriek often times hangs in the air moments after you've made it.  It's a universal sound and everyone who hears it, knows the person making the sound has been startled.

When we first moved into the Munger house, it had rats and I made that sound often.  After being there for a while, I was no longer startled by the rats.  When we put the good poison down, I'd open a door, a dead rat would be there and I would just close the door or move the piece of furniture back in it's place till my husband got home. 
 
A few months ago, we were having horrible problems w/ rats.  I had forgotten the shrillest shriek, but became acquainted with it again quickly.  We couldn't find the good poison anywhere.  Yes there is a "good poison" they (rats) apparently use the poison from the grocery store as a snack.  Once you crossed the threshold of the kitchen, you were in their territory.  I quit going in the kitchen after a certain time of evening.  They were also trying to come through the wall in the bathroom.  Pretty soon, the whole house would be theirs.  One night, after dark, I heard Abbey make the shrillest shriek.  I didn't get scared, I knew what the sound was.  The next day, I went online in search of the "good poison", and I found it.  We mounted an assault against the rat hordes.  After a couple of days, I knew we were winning.  The smell of dead animal was so strong, it made me nauseous.  I had to open the few windows we have and turn on every fan.  We've been rat free for a few months now but Spring is here, the rabbits are back and I'm sure the rats will follow.  

Maaan do I miss Crackheads

We've been in this house for quite a while now & I've decided I really miss Crackheads.  Crackheads would do anything you needed them to do, for ten dollars.  If it was a big job, I'd give'em twenty dollars.  Our trees needed to be trimmed, the leaves needed to be raked up and a plethora of other odd jobs, need to be done.  Unfortunately, since there aren't any Crackheads around, I have to pay through the nose, for things to get done.  My gutters are so full, they've actually sprouted weeds.  If there was just one Crackhead around, all of my outdoor problems would be solved.  Oh well.

OW! That hurt my heart!

Time again to catch up w/ the Mason kids.  My kids are aged 11, 8 and 4.  My 4 year old Dash, is quite a little pistol.
A few months back, I was sitting in the living room and heard these words, coming from my daughter: "Ow, that hurt my heart!"  I started laughing, because those words coming from a 10 year old, just don't fit.  Then I remembered Dash, the Diabolical, so I thought I should investigate.   In the hallway, I found my daughter, doubled over clutching her chest.  Dash, the Diabolical had struck again.  He jumped up and kicked Abbey dead in her chest.  No, I didn't go after Dash, to whoop his behind.  I was more concerned with watching Abbey and making sure her heart didn't stop.  It probably did hurt her heart.  Her heart probably skipped a beat.  If she would have been on a heart monitor at that moment, she might've flatlined for a second.  Everyone has seen the electric paddles doctors or EMS people use to revive a patient.  I imagine his tiny foot contacting her heart, most likely jolted it, somewhat similar to the way those paddles work.  Needless to say, she was just fine.  

Peace held no more...

That's right, I've held my peace long enough. Its time to drop some dimes. Its hard to know where to start. First off, the recession is on because of the REPUBLICANS. How is it, that Obama's been the President for jut a little more than year, but all the layoffs & the state of the economy is his fault? Y'all need to get real. Yes, I will agree that the Democrats played a part in this too, because they agreed on the war 8 or (is it) 9 years ago. We all know that EVERYONE was duped. I'm an Obama supporter, but he is making a mistake sending troops to Afghanistan. Yes, that's most likely where Osama Bin Laden is, but at this point in the game, we don't need to send troops out. We should be doing what we can to help Iraq recover, & then withdrawing our troops. The money that we're spending, sending troops to Afghanistan could go towards something else. This is not a war like WWII where we know & can see our enemy. The money that we're spending over there, could go towards making America safe. Our enemies are here, living amongst us. 

Next, the douche bags at Chrysler are reneging on our deal, but if Obama wouldn't have approved the bailout, we would have just had more layoffs sooner. Don't worry, all those higher ups at Chrysler, AIG etc. are gonna get theirs. Maybe not today & maybe not tomorrow, but trust & believe, they are gonna reap the world wind.

Alright, time for the Bible thumping, racist, Republican super conservatives. All of u can kiss my ass & go straight to hell. Let their lily white daughters be raped by a black man, they'd carry her to have an abortion so fast, it would make their own heads spin. You don't believe in abortion but you do believe in the death penalty. Get the f**k outta here. If you're not rich, you should not be a Republican. I don't understand how conservative, so called Christians, can justify all of their political beliefs & still call themselves Christians. Their beliefs, are the exact opposite of what Jesus teaches in the Bible. You freakin' hypocrite make me sick to my stomach. I actually have an over all bad feeling when I think about you. I also don't appreciate you giving Christians a bad name, because of you, souls will be lost.

NEXT!!! To everyone that's against passing the health care bill into law, you are some selfish, greedy, hateful, low down dirty dogs & you'll get yours just like Chrysler & AIG will get theirs. I just wish I could be there to see it. You make my booty itch. There's no reason for one of the most prosperous countries in the world to be behind Cuba in health care. Yes, if u didn't know, Cuba, a 3rd world country has better health care than America. Even a deranged dictator like Fidel Castro isn't as crooked as our own politicians, pharmaceutical & insurance companies. If you're not rich, you shouldn't be against health care for all. All it would take is for you to get sick & have your insurance drop yo ass like hot potato. You'd be sick, & possibly lose your home. You would then regret the decision to be against health care for all. To all the idiots, claiming that their against health care because it would make taxes higher, are u insane. My family spends 400 & sum odd dollars on insurance alone every month. That's not including the price of prescriptions. Every month, we don't know if somethings gonna happen where our insurance is gonna drop us or not. If there was health care for all, our taxes would go up but you would no longer live in fear of getting sick & being dropped. I would be happy, no, delighted to pay 400 & sum odd dollars more in taxes every month for my peace of mind & possibly no co pays for prescriptions or doctors visits. Also, if you don't have to pay what you're currently pay in insurance, & that money instead went to the government for the exact same thing, how would u be getting hosed?  It comes out the same & you'd be getting more for your money. Time for the Douchebag of the year award. This year it goes to: (drum roll please) Joe Lieberman. Oh how I'd like to do bad things to this traitorous douche bag. Maybe its because I'm so loyal, to my own detriment at times, that I want to punish him to death by a thousand cuts. Ok, thats all of my rant for now. I'll be back later w/ more cause the Genie is out of this bottle.

Spring Fever

I don't know if y'all have heard about the Binghamton, New York shooting yet but if you haven't, I believe 17 people were killed there today. Of course I have a theory. It's Spring Fever. I'm not making light of this tragedy, I'm just telling you what contributed to it. There's always a little truth in Old Wives Tales. People react just as strangely to the first of spring as they do to a full moon. Let me give you some more examples. The Oklahoma City bombing was in April, The Branch Dividian stand off in Waco,Tx was in April too. Also Columbine and Virginia Tech. My Grandmother said that her Daddy (my G-Grandpaw) would snap every spring and jump on somebody. They used to have to send him away to air him out a bit. Don't tell her I said this, but Grandmother, who suffers from "the crazies" too gets belligerent and wacky. I've been trying to recover from my slow downward slide this first of spring as well. Once again, not making light of these tragedies, spring does something to people. Take my advice and try to be nice to people this 1st of spring, you don't want to be the one that makes someone snap.

IT REALLY HAPPENED!!!

Yesterday history was made. Even Osama Bin Ladan knew about it & he really has been hiding under a rock for the last 2 years. I wouldn't let myself believe it was really gonna happen, until I saw it and other black people felt the same way. You see, as a people, we hope for the best & expect the worse, that way our hopes won't be dashed. I watched, half expecting the ghost of Bull Connor to appear and knock the Bible from under our new President's hand, but let me back up. The "Procession of Presidents Passed" was what was really interesting. Each of them looking more haggard than the last and poor President Carter looked like a "haint" (a ghost, for those of you who are to Citified to know that word). Then they finally got to President Bush, who looked like he had been on an extended vacation. The job hasn't aged him an iota. The other Presidents had been aged by what I imagine is the hardest job in all the free world, and this jack-ass has pep in his step. Here comes Dick Cheney being wheeled out looking like Mr. Potter from It's a Wonderful Life. When I saw Cheney, I instantly thought of the "scurvy little spider" speech the fictional George Bailey made to the also fictional Henry Potter. It was nice to see our super cool Obama, have nervous laughter when he took the Oath of Office. To me, it made him feel more real. The "dark cloud" over the festivities was that when G.W. took flight he was coming back to Texas, and eventually to Dallas. He should do well to remember, Texas may be a "red state" but Dallas County is blue.

My hapless husband

Phone: Ring, ring,

Me: Hello

Voice: Is this Mrs. Jaime Mason?

Me: Yes

Voice: Mrs. Mason, your husband fell into a manhole and broke both his legs.

Me: Hmm. Is he unconscious?

Voice: No ma'am he's screaming & in a lot of pain.

Me: Of course he is. I'll be there as soon as I can.

I hope this scenario never happens but if it does, I wouldn't be surprised. Let me take you back to the beginning of our marriage:

'98: Acid Reflux. He lost threw up constantly & lost 20 lbs. before diagnosed.

'98: Really bad flu.

'98: Shingles.

'99: Battery acid in his eyes.

'00: Nearly set house on fire.

'02: Steps on a 2 1/2-3 inch rusty nail.

'02: Falls down stairs.

'02: Falls down stairs... again.

'02: Falls downstairs carrying Abbey.

'02: Falls downstairs & is no longer allowed to carry Abbey up or down the stairs.

'03: Falls in the shower.

'03: Homeless man sleeps in his car.

'04: Falls up the stairs...Yes, he fell up the stairs & hit his head on the top stair.

'05: Constantly trips over newly installed gates.

'06: Scrubbing a stain out of Abbey's carpet, he pops a ligament in his finger & has to wear a weird finger cast.

'06: Still tripping over the gates.

'07: Windshield wipers go out in a storm & he drives home w/ the drivers side window down, wiping the windshield manually. When he gets home his whole left side is soggy.

'07: Still can't quite get the hang of those gates.

'08: Brakes fail completely on the way home. Has to use emergency brake to stop at red lights. Since he uses his car as his office, everything flies forward upon stops.

'08: Getting a bike for Abbey, he pulls a bike down from above & nearly knocks himself unconscious.

'08: And last but not least, is arrested for a 5 year old warrant and manhandled by the police.

I love that man.